If He Can’t Have Her

Like a fish out of water
he gasps
the air an enemy to his lungs
but more, he needs more
because either way he’s suffocating
and he’ll take it no other way
as the alternative is without her
and there’s just no way its worth it
to survive with her with someone else
someone who isn’t himself
so he gasps again
taking in as much of the toxic air as he can
before staying in the forever memory
of when they were together
a sleep from which he hopes he won’t awake

Assignation

What even is time, but unfair?
A supposed well-deserved title for a forced throne
as I wish merely for the sweet escape of your company
where the background fades to the loudest silence
committed to our moment
the truest adoration hops elegantly from note to note
your pheromones a natural concoction of obsession

Tinder glances beneath the whisps of brown curly curtains
that shield your cocoa eyes, especially from my gaze
while our breath dances together; in sync our lungs respire
We tempt to risk the fates set by Venus for our own temporary delight
thoughts to show up in the light, tip-toe from the shadows
but without a healthy plan, disaster a fortune from the simple

With barely minutes left to spare, a separation nears
Reminders of limits set a neurotic frenzy above my shoulders
and makes a buzzing ring my ears
and when you notice, you always do
another notch in the column of reasons why we should
out-notching the reasons why we won’t
and shall not ever, still

At First Sight

I have had the glorious pleasure of meeting your acquaintance,

and dare I say you’ve struck a chord on the mandolin in my heart;

Unforgettable.

Anxiously, I await the day to once more to be graced with your presence,

Star struck by your benevolent rhythm in the way you walk.

Your glimmering eyes spoke directly to mine, a delicate conversation,

is there really more to be said of obvious perfection;

Undeniable.

Patiently, the days become nights before once more we shall meet,

and I to be reminded by the quickening of my pulse when nearest you again.

Riding Time

She stumbled between the sixth dimension and the reality she stole years prior
and no one was the wiser
until she found herself in a battle with herself, determined to steal her future
determined to find a way to bring him back
the one who got away

so there she stood, in the doorway of her bedroom and the underpass of the city
emotions ripping from side to side
her hand banging and throbbing in the collision of time
and without much time left
he pulled her through

Confession

He sat undaunted, still
his mind too jumbled for walking to ensue
and he couldn’t seem to trust himself
so there, he sat
the black bench, ordinary
but vital to his sanity as of yet
his view of the dewy grass sprawled across the park inspired nil
coffee and breakfast smells sent hungry animals dashing
across the sidewalk near his dark brown shoes
and there, he sat
replaying the look in her eyes
as he said those words, his truths, his mistakes
and as she moved through emotion
so quickly, all the “what? no!’s”
the “I ..don’t think I want to see you right now’s “
and “GET THE FUCK OUT!!’s”…

without a question
he grabbed his coat
unsure why he’d done that, it was summer
but his mind was all confused
because he had to say something,
he had to tell her
something…

right?

I’ve Found Fire

I’ve found fire through the coldness of her warm hands
flame so hot and bright, white light projects across the sky
water dripping from her fingertips making oceans near her feet
and there I stand, my hands cradling around her own
not a word shared between, let the silence be renown
She shivered into the air, her breath a gust of raging wind
Anger escaping from within
Her frame, still a cold, delicate mess
The light in her eyes grabbing at me, again, just as it had at dawn
I searched within her honey filled eyes for the words her lips were too blue to say
The fire in her palms growing yet her body, glistening ice
“I’ve found fire” she thought so hard I heard it travel from her mind
And into mine, but in that instant, a sleep befell her
The fire through the coldness of her warm hands
with the flame so hot and bright that white light projected across the sky
slipped between her fingers, beneath her knuckles
and tucked itself into my palms
setting loose a raging anger within

Exposed

My secrets kept me warm,
worn tightly knit across my chest and weaved
down from my arms to my feet
words that I’d never speak
And there you were
honey eyes
begging to understand how I am
to tear down my cloak
and replace it with your arms

The fire in your chest amplified
as I slowly stripped
tongue hot
goosebumps perched along my arms
the words came accompanied with tears
mine
and yours
And when my mouth snapped shut
the words faded away

There I sat
nude, exposed
Those honey eyes casting flames
against my pale, cold skin
sparking the heat once again

Common Modifications

Words fly past your ears
to the empty space behind
while your eyes
intend to convince my heart
that it cannot possibly be  how I say, as I say
instead
that I remain a lie
everything about me, for me,
of me
a treacherous untruth concocted to drive you into your personal hell
and all I can do is sink further into myself
and quiet my voice
as it will otherwise go unheard
so
I bury my feelings, my thoughts, and beliefs
until they can no longer breathe or exist
and I become everything you want
to ensure your smile stays
and the smile that I plaster across my face
will cover my tragedy

 

I’ll Stay Until I Can’t

Can I stay
and lose my mind in everything that you are
because it doesn’t take much

At some point you’ll feel it
too, the electricity
lighting up my heart so bright

But it’ll be the end of me
the day you realize your current
wasn’t permanent

Just a temporary jolt
to make you realize that what you really need
what you really want

isn’t me.

Cheater

Its stunning
a brilliant disaster covered in
kisses and sweet nothings
A gutsy laugh from the bellows
of regret escapes his tantalizing tongue
He says all the right things
and she feels all the right ways
but honesty is fearless
bold and loud
It snakes into the cerebellum
flipping the switch on the twinges of guilt
felt during each embrace
You are not each others
but stolen time from broken commitment
Beneath the shadow  of the sun,
midday,
you sneak and sway, torturing time with lies
and smiles, unfair
while the suffocation of unreturned love
twists into the lungs of both betrothed
unbeknown to one another that they’re
dying of the same lack of breath